How Imposter Syndrome Makes Every Choice Feel Risky
When you're struggling with imposter syndrome, even everyday decisions can feel loaded. You're already doubting yourself — questioning whether you're good enough, whether you really belong, whether others will find you out. And then comes a choice: a project to take on, a job opportunity, a relationship step, or even just speaking up in a meeting. The stakes suddenly feel impossibly high.
Underneath it all is the worry:
“What if I get it wrong?”
“What if this finally shows everyone I don’t actually know what I’m doing?”
The Weight of Every Decision
If you live with imposter feelings, you may recognise this pattern:
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You overthink every option
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You keep going back and forth, never quite feeling sure
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You look for the “right” answer — the one that will protect you from failure, judgment, or regret
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You feel anxious not just about the decision itself, but about what it says about you
It’s not just about choosing well. It’s about proving yourself — again — and trying not to let anyone down.
Anxiety and the Need for Certainty
Imposter syndrome and anxiety often work hand in hand. When you're unsure of your worth or competence, anxiety fills the gap by demanding certainty. You start looking for signs that this is the right move, that you won’t mess it up, that it won’t expose you as a fraud. But life doesn’t come with guarantees — and that’s what anxiety struggles to accept.
Anxiety might remind you of decisions that didn’t go well. It might compare you to others who seem more capable or decisive. It might whisper that you’re one mistake away from being “found out.” And so you try to cover all bases: you analyse, seek reassurance, delay, research again, or avoid making the decision altogether.
The Cost of Self-Doubt in Decision-Making
This kind of decision-making isn’t just exhausting — it’s limiting. You might start:
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Turning down opportunities because they feel too risky
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Playing small to avoid scrutiny
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Saying yes to things you don’t want to do, just to avoid disappointing others
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Relying on others to make the decisions, so you’re not “to blame” if things go wrong
The more you doubt yourself, the more anxious you feel. The more anxious you feel, the more you doubt yourself. It’s a loop that can be hard to get out of — and it can stop you from building the kind of life and career you actually want.
Therapy Can Help You Unhook from the Fear of Getting It Wrong
In therapy, we can explore how imposter syndrome and anxiety influence your decision-making. We look at:
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The standards you’re holding yourself to
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The hidden rules you might be following (“I should always know what I’m doing,” “I can’t make mistakes”)
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The ways anxiety pushes you to seek safety in certainty or avoidance
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The values and direction that matter to you — not just what feels safest
Using evidence-based approaches like CBT, ACT, and CFT, we’ll build your ability to step back from self-doubt, make decisions based on what matters most to you, and learn to tolerate uncertainty without letting it define you.
If you find yourself constantly questioning your decisions, feeling stuck in your head, or worrying that one wrong move will expose you — it doesn’t have to be this way. Therapy can help you reconnect with your confidence, your values, and your ability to move forward, even when it’s hard.