What to Expect in Your First Therapy Session
Starting therapy can feel like a big step, especially if you’re not quite sure what to expect. You might be feeling nervous, uncertain, or even wondering if your problems are “serious enough.” That’s completely normal. This page is here to give you a clear sense of what that first session will involve and how we’ll begin to make sense of what you’re struggling with.
Getting Clear on What You’re Looking for Help With
The first part of the session is all about understanding what’s brought you to therapy. I’ll ask you to tell me about the difficulties you’ve been experiencing — things like anxiety, self-doubt, low self-esteem, or that nagging sense of not feeling good enough. You don’t need to have it all worked out or explain everything perfectly. We’ll work together to get clear on what you’re looking for support with.
Exploring How the Problem Shows Up
Once we’ve identified the main areas you’re struggling with, we’ll look in more detail at how those problems show up in your day-to-day life. How do you experience them? When do they tend to show up most? What impact are they having — not just internally, but across the areas of your life that matter to you?
Together, we’ll look at how these struggles affect things like:
- Your work or studies
- Relationships (friends, family, partners, colleagues)
- Your physical and emotional health
- Your interests and hobbies
- Everyday responsibilities and routines
I’ll often ask for specific examples in order to get a clearer picture of how these difficulties are playing out for you in real life.
Spotting the Patterns That Are Keeping You Stuck
As we talk, I’ll be listening out for any patterns in how you think, feel, and behave that may be keeping the problems going. We’re not just interested in what you’re struggling with — but how you’re getting stuck.
These patterns often include:
- Overthinking - such as worrying, ruminating, over-analysing, or self-criticism
- Avoidance - putting things off, withdrawing from situations, playing it safe
- Trying to block out thoughts or feeling - ignoring, suppressing, distracting
- Unhelpful coping strategies - like people-pleasing, perfectionism, procrastination, overworking, or even numbing out with food, alcohol, or screens
Sometimes, even when we know a strategy isn’t working — or is even making things worse — it can still feel like the only option in the moment. That’s something we’ll gently explore, without judgement.
Making Sense of It All
I always want to understand your experiences in the context of your life — your history, your learning, and what you’ve been through. Often, the ways we think and cope made a lot of sense at some point in our lives, even if they’re not helping now. Together, we’ll start to make sense of how these patterns developed and why they might be showing up the way they are.
At the same time, therapy is very much focused on the present — on understanding what’s keeping the problem going now and what we can start to shift.
Setting Initial Goals for Therapy
Toward the end of the session, we’ll look at what you’d hope to get out of therapy. If our sessions were helpful, what would feel different? What would change in how you think, feel, or go about your life?
These initial goals help give us direction — but they’re not set in stone. We can revise them as therapy progresses and your needs evolve.
Introducing the Therapy Approach
Finally, I’ll explain a bit about how I work. I’ll usually say something like:
“In therapy, we’re going to focus on where you find yourself getting stuck — and what’s keeping the problem going. While your history is important and helps us understand how you see yourself and the world, we’re especially interested in the patterns that are maintaining the difficulty now. The aim is to better understand those patterns and work together to build more helpful ways of thinking and behaving that are in line with the kind of life you want to lead.”
In other words, we’re not just here to talk — we’re here to figure out what’s keeping you stuck, and more importantly, what we can do about it.
You don’t need to prepare anything special
You don’t need to come to the session with everything worked out. Many people start therapy feeling unsure or overwhelmed — that’s completely okay. My role is to guide the process and help you make sense of things, step by step.
If you have questions or want to chat before booking your first session, feel free to get in touch.